So maybe I made the wrong choice between Ben and Damian …. As my mum advises always have one in the waiting room! So time to give Damian a chance. It doesn’t get off to a good start with me going to the wrong bar and then getting lost on the way to the new one, but I guess that’s typical of me so I guess start as I mean to go on! Oh and I was so hungover I’m not sure how I even made it through the day in the office let alone get myself dressed and ready for a first date.
The first thing to note about Damian is his accent, very Australian but is for the Home Counties and never lived there. Interesting. And then the job interview begins …. There’s me thinking I’m on a date but 2 questions in and he’s asking if I want kids, if I want to get married and giving me a time frame on when I would be allowed to meet his kids! I mean I’m all for not wasting time and getting the back story but even I wouldn’t do this in the first 30 minutes of date one! At this point all I can think about is what is the best drink to cure my hangover. After a prosecco, espresso martini, rosé and gin I realise nothing is going to help apart from food. It’s obviously now pouring with rain which seems to happen a lot to me on dates and the nearest place is Pizza Express. There is obviously a time and a place for Pizza Express and don’t get me wrong who doesn’t love a 2 for 1 deal but it’s not really what first date dreams are made of. Then he suggests sharing a pizza as in one pizza between 2?! I politely roll with it but know how hungry I am and I’m definitely not a salad eater on a date especially on a raging hangover.
We find a bit of common ground in our love for Ibiza, cooking and turns out we have the same birthday which I’m clinging to with all my hope that maybe there is something there and this could turn into a love story after all. There is a definite lack of humour but as I am trying the sophisticated older man thing, I must persevere. And then the bill comes. As you have probably already gathered I am quite a traditionalist when it comes to the bill on a first date, and I am aware that in this day in age this can be considered controversial and anti feminist. But I’m not ashamed, and I do believe in equality but I also believe in chivalry and I refuse to believe that chivalry is dead.
Or maybe it is!! If it wasn’t bad enough that we share a pizza in Pizza Express, so I’m actually still pretty hungry, he splits the £25 bill. I mean I think I would have rather pay the whole thing than sit there while the waiter struggles with the maths.
The night finishes early which is a relief as I’m still starving and definitely need to get home to eat more and have a well earned lie down. He walks me to the station, kisses me and very straight forwardly asks me on a second date to his for dinner, and with that he’s gone. Now I know the above doesn’t suggest that I’m majorly keen for a second date, I definitely haven’t fallen head over heels, but at this point getting to a second date is a big achievement, so I’m taking it with a grin on my face.
As has become a ritual after a first date, I download all the stats to my mum and as usual she answers my synopsis with a ‘But what was wrong with him??’ This time I don’t answer with a ‘but’ instead I proudly tell her I have a second date planned and he’s cooking me dinner at his. Very stupidly of me I didn’t predict the reaction I got from her! She immediately wrote him off as an axe murderer, and how could I possibly consider going to his on a second date. To be fair she probably had a point but it’s been a while now and a girl has needs! (Not that I could tell her that part!)
Anyway turned out this was a wasted discussion as I got ghosted! And ghosted by a guy with a lot of baggage that I wasn’t even that into! After planning the date, opting for dinner out to save my mum having a melt down, he just didn’t reply on the day! No ‘I’m sorry somethings come up at work’,or ‘I need the look after the kids’ or even a simple ‘can I rain check?’ just a frustrating, checking my phone every 5 seconds, plain old radio silence. So I guess that was my first official experience of being ghosted and strangely enough I did not like it and from here on in I pledge not to ghost anyone, however easy it might be.
One good thing to come out of this date was 2 hilarious dating stories he shared with me that give my disastrous dates a run for their money. I’ll tell you all about them next Sunday! Enjoy your week xxx